Wednesday, October 8, 2008

My Daily Reminders for the Office

  • When saying words that end in 'ing' ... say the 'g.'
  • When listening to hip-hop, always use the headphones.
  • Don't look angry, even when you're fuckin' angry.
  • When greeting clients, don't say "wuddup?"
  • When greeting clients, don't say "howdy!" either. There's no need to compensate.
  • Don't allow Black panhandlers to guilt you into giving them money because you're walking with your white coworkers. Give them money because you want to... or don't.
  • You've gone this far without playing drinking games. Don't start now.
  • You are in no way inferior because you didn't travel to Europe before, during or immediately after college.
  • Save the CB4, Fear of a Black Hat, Major Payne, Last Dragon, Dolemite, Malcom X, School Daze and Hollywood Shuffle references for another time. They won't get them. Even if you find the clip on YouTube and e-mail it to them.

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